everything happens for a reason

Over the course of this past weekend, I had several conversations that seemed to lead me back to one of my least favorite phrases, "Everything happens for a reason."  Man I hate that expression.  Really, everything?  I think if you're evolved enough, you can easily find lessons in EVERYTHING that happens in life.

I do believe that events happen as a combination of fate and free-will.  While I don't believe that there is a puppet master pulling strings trying to guide our experiences, I do recognize the intricate web all of our karma creates weaving experiences together in what feels something like fate.

Many people say that we come together with other people for a reason, that there is a destiny that can justify how people meet.  I wish I could believe that the people in my life have placement in my world because of this romantic notion that we were meant to meet.  Unfortunately, I just can't fully get on board with the idea that each and every person in my life has an intrinsic purpose and a part to play and that it was pre-destined that we'd meet.

None the less... I took a good look at the people in my life this weekend... going back in time, wandering the streets of the neighborhoods where I lived, worked, made impressions and created connections with hosts of people, wandering by old apartments, bars I drank in, shops I shopped in, places I rolled my son in his stroller, my old Urban Monster store front and the vacant space where our favorite coffee once was...  I could see details that continue to remain a constant and the changes.  I was able to identify how I have made a mark on people in a time line that makes up my life with the symbolism of architectural details which remain and the things that were new and different. 

Soaking in nostalgic feelings of a lifetime behind me and seeing old friends with whom I shared a sense of community at one point highlighted snapshots of a lifetime's journey behind me.  I have met so many people in my almost forty-two years of life.   At different points, many of them have had a purpose for why they entered my life.  Each of them connects me and anchors me to humanity in someway or another.  In the mix of people I saw over the weekend... there were people I am close to, people I used to be close to, and some people with whom I am no longer friends.  Time changes, and each of these people have taught me something, even if the thing they presented me was merely that feeling of community and human connection.  There's something really great as an alien like freak to have that feeling of being able to connect with someone else on any level.

One thing I'm super grateful for right now are the people with whom I am closest to right now.  I have a small circle of friends in my life right now with whom I'd say I have deep connections with.  Everyone in my life right at this moment has a purpose, because the people in my life today mirror a more authentic version of myself than I've ever portrayed before.  As I continue to evolve and grow, I'm attracting new people into my life who provide me with a new sense of connection and deeper level of understanding and support.

You see, it isn't the universe or a puppeteer who brings this love into my life... it is me.  My action, my change, my evolution isn't so different from the store fronts of Smith Street.  There is change and there are constants, it won't stop the gentrification of the neighborhood.  It may make some people sad to see a shop close... but it only makes room for something new to take it's place.  And honestly, if you don't like it, you can do like I did, and MOVE up and out all together.